Monday, June 2, 2008

I eat candy everyday!

I eat candy everyday. That's right. I'm not afraid to admit it. I know it's not socially acceptable in an age of tofu, organic vegetables and soy. I don't care.

Now some people really like candy. I LOVE candy. I even dream about candy. In color.


I enjoy it immensely. I can't imagine my life without candy. It gives me way too much pleasure.


So, I decided a long time ago to follow the lyrics to that sweet song...you know the one that goes, "if loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right."

I think I "inherited" my sweet tooth from my mother. She also LOVED candy. I can grab a handful of my childhood memories and they come out chocolate covered. YUM. Candy can be found in every candy jar memory.

Remember my sixth grade fair that I mentioned in an earlier post. My mom was in charge of the penny candy stand. SWEET! I love, love love those little brown bags of penny candy. And yes, each piece of scrumpious joy was only ONE penny.

I am thankful that mom never worried about giving us too much candy. Honestly, I am.

In my lovely elementary school, there was a marvelous janitor who did an amazing impersonation of Sammy Davis, Jr singing Candy Man. We loved him. We called him Mr. Rolie-Polie and begged him to sing the candy song. He always did. And, he always carried candy in his pockets to give away. School was better then. We could eat junk. Thank you Mr. Roland for being a sweet, dear man. You made our school days so much fun. I bet you run the candy store in heaven.

I know what you are thinking about now. But you may be wrong. My family has that fast metabolism thing going on. Most of my life I was able to eat everything and anything...and lots of it...anytime I wanted. Irritating, I know.

I am thankful for all those years of carefree noshing...'cause having the guilt of calories chips off the candy coating on the jawbreaker of the sweet life. If you are worrying about how many calories are in your Dove bar...it takes away some of the fun.


I say most of my life...because that changed about 5 years ago. I'm not stick thin anymore. I'm not obese. I'm average. I could stand to lose those ten pounds...maybe fifteen. But, I won't give up my candy. And fake candy is not candy. But, summer is here and I have to fit into one of those things posted above. I have to look okay or my teens won't sit with me on the beach blanket ...or within 100 yards of me.

I used to think I was the only candy freak around until I read this book by Steve Almond. That's his real name!! He's my hero. Steve, if by some twist of licorice rope you happen to read this, contact me. I want to know what you think of that new Reeses's whip candy bar.
Yes, I know it's not healthy, but...





I'm working on a solution people. I'm going to start exercising. I dislike exercise as much as I LOVE candy. I think I'll start off slow... by walking everyday. I've got reinforcements...portable rejuvenators.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie-pop?


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